Page 15 - Мой проект1

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Page 15
The Rockaway Times
While surfing the net recently
looking for some gift ideas for the
family I came across an offering
from Nordstrom touting a me-
dium leather-wrapped stone for
only $85! I was somewhat curious
as towhat thebackground story of
this stonewas thatmade it so spe-
cial. Sadly Nordstrom was unable
toprovideany specifics other than
to state "Apaperweight? A conver-
sationpiece? Aworkof art? It'sup
to you but this smooth Los Ange-
lesareastone is sure todrawatten-
tionwherever it rests."
In short, Nordstrom was ask-
ing me to lay out $85 for a non-
descript rock found lying around
somewhere in the Los Angeles
area. Had the rock been pilfered
from beneath the Hollywood sign
or filched from the property of
some motion picture star or even
purloined from the La Brea tar
pits inHancock Park the worth of
the stonemight have been added
to but for all I (and Nordstrom)
know, the rock may have been
pocketed by someone coming off
a bender and waking up in the
concrete basin of the Los Angeles
Thatbeingsaid, ImustaddthatI
wasnot tooquick todismisswhat,
at first glance, appeared to be
nothing more than a bonehead-
ed marketing ploy on the part of
a business to take advantage of
the holiday Christmas season.
After all, during Christmas back
in 1975, Gary Dahl unleashed a
horde of igneous invertebrates,
also known as "Pet Rocks," upon
the American consumer for $3.95
a pop. Replete with a cardboard
pet rock carrier with air holes, a
strawbedand leashaccompanied
by a 32-page trainingmanual with
newpet rockto: "sit"and"stay" the
free" pet.
Back then I had a Gilligan's Is-
land Thurston Howell moment
and decided to buy several pet
rocks and put themaway as a col-
lector’s item with a strong belief
that over the years, if maintained
in mint condition, they would be
worth substantially more than I
paid for them. Although the pet
rock fad was short-lived, more
than five million of the endearing
stones were sold and Gary Dahl
became amillionaire almost over-
night while laughing his way to
the bank! As for my investment
scheme, I think the last time I ac-
tually remember seeing any of my
pet rocks was sometime back in
the early 80's when I used themas
gifts to my colleagues at a "Secret
Santa" officeparty.
Fast forward some 40 plus years
I considermyselfmuchwiser than
I was back in 1975 so once again,
completely disregarding the defi-
nition of insanity as something
you keep repeating over and over
in the hopes of obtaining a dif-
ferent outcome, I decided that I
should invest a couple of bucks
and purchase several of the Nord-
strom leather wrapped stones
and give them to my daughters
as keepsakes with the caveat
that they should safeguard and
maintain them in the event their
worth appreciates over the com-
ing years. Unfortunately, after
checking online I discovered that
the stones were sold out. I called
Nordstrom customer service and
after I convinced the staff person
I was speaking with that I was not
recently escaped or released from
amental facility or rehab, they ad-
visedme theywere in fact soldout
and not expecting any replace-
ment stock of the sought after
leatherwrapped stones.
Not to be undone, armed with
the sage advice of Mrs. Thurston
Howell ("Lovey") who said "An-
yone who says money can't buy
happiness doesn't know where
to shop," I intend to head up the
Broad Channel Gift Shop tomor-
row as word on the street has it
that a few Hillary Clinton and
Donald Trump Chia Pets may
still be available. After the recent
electionyou just know theywill be
worth something in20or 30 years!
Broad Channel, why would an-
yonewant to live anywhere else?