I know what you’ll be doing this weekend. Or at least I know what you THINK you’ll be doing this weekend.  As the warm weather finally breaks, you THINK you will be heading out into the great outdoors to catch up on all the yardwork that’s been accumulating since late fall (and that includes finally taking in the plastic pumpkins that the neighbors have been ridiculing since New Year’s Day). You’ll drag out the rake and give a quick pass over all the detritus that somehow has nested on your

Some creative morsels for you to savor, or not!

• Spherical tortilla chips with guacamole in the middle.
• For Penn and Teller's last trick before they retire, Teller should make Penn mute and then start talking.
• Make Nigeria a tax-free haven to attract big businesses and see them struggle to be taken seriously.
• NBA players mic'd up.
• Since people already "identify" as different genders, why not identify as a different nationality?
• Take a fast-talking auctioneer and a decent rap artist and

Here are some more ideas we cooked up for you. And most are dumb!

Maybe robots taking over the world isn't the worst thing.

Have a building where the elevators are fixed, and pressing a floor button moves the entire building to the floor you want to go to

Add beer to nicotine, and smoke it, or drink it.

Americans can give up their vote in exchange for a free Big Mac every election.

Make a bacon-flavored tooth paste to encourage people to brush their teeth.

Commit crimes, but have a friend

Sharing ideas is what we do. And, of course, sometimes we share pretty useless stuff, but sometimes we share some gems--great ideas that we’re just too lazy to pursue. We don’t think such sharing should be limited to a newspaper column.

We’d like to propose Idea Day in schools. In advance of such a day, teachers and club moderators could talk about ideas and collaboration, and how great things come to be. And they could start to plan an Idea Day at which students could present ideas and maybe

I’m sure it says something about me that most of my ideas have to do with improving life in the bathroom, but that’s a column for another day. Today, we will try to navigate the uncertain limitations of the household hot water tank. The problem? Running out of hot water. The fact is, in a contemporary household populated by two adults and three teenagers, the politics of bathroom usage can get pretty ugly. 

One of the most commonly asked questions in our house is “what the (heck) are they

Who doesn’t love Amazon?  Virtually anything your heart desires is merely a click away from being delivered to your front door. If there’s anything better than Amazon Prime, I haven’t figured it out. For about $100 per year, you get free shipping on most purchases, and unlimited access to Amazon Prime movies and TV series.  Subscribe & Save means I never have to remember to buy toilet paper, tooth brushes, K cups or deodorant again.  Amazon remembers for me, and they appear magically on a