Love - It’s Not What You Think - Or Is It?

Be Well Be Happy

What we are taught about love is that it’s “out there somewhere.” Well, what if it’s not? I’m not saying that love doesn’t exist. I am suggesting that it doesn’t exist in the way that most of us think it does. Imagine if the very thing you are searching for, resides deep inside of you, a “state of being” that you could access if you only knew how. Imagine if love wasn’t something you had to go find by meeting the perfect someone, or getting married, or having a relationship, boy, that would really change everything now, wouldn’t it? Well, you’re in luck as far as I’m concerned, because I don’t believe we can “find” love, I believe that we can only “be” love.

Many of us have had the wonderful feeling of “falling in love” with someone. We meet someone that we really like, a person who listens to us, seems interested in our life, helps us to feel good about ourselves, and we say, “I’m falling in love.” Yes, you are falling in love, but what if the person you are falling in love with is actually yourself? Now there’s a novel idea, but I think it’s the truth.

Where we get into trouble is thinking that it’s someone else that is responsible for how we feel. We are the only ones responsible for how we feel, ever! So, if you can practice being in a state of love, then nothing will shake you, you will take nothing personally, you won’t be judgmental, and when people are around you, they will only feel this wonderful feeling emanating from inside of you. This, of course, will make them want to be around you all the time. Have you ever heard someone say, “I don’t know what it is about her/him, but I just love being around her/him.

If we only look outside of ourselves for the answers, we will eventually be disappointed. When we look outside of ourselves for something, we are giving other people power over how we feel. We should always be the creators of our own world and never allow anyone to be the deciding factor in how we feel. You are probably saying, “Now, how am I suppose to do that?”

Well, the first thing you have to recognize is that love resides within you. Think of a great memory, a wonderful moment in life; your graduation, seeing an old friend after a long time, just holding the hand of someone really dear to you, that moment when your dog comes to greet you at the door, a kind word from a stranger. Now, bask in that feeling, take it in deep, remember it, embrace it and know, that THAT is who you are. That wonderful feeling you are feeling has to be coming from somewhere, and since there is no one around at the moment, it has to be coming from inside of you. Life can be challenging at times, to say the least.

So, it’s not always easy to remember that the love and peace and happiness we are looking for actually live right within our own hearts.
 For me, life is about the moments, the moments that we can remember to be in that wonderful place inside of ourselves which helps to create more of that feeling in the world. I’m not saying it’s easy, the world has certainly made it hard for us to remember what’s truly important. Take a minute to think about what you have read here, try it on. If you are down for some reason, bring up a great memory and live within it for a bit and remember that “joy” you feel is actually a part of who you are. If you are feeling wonderful for no apparent reason, then you already know that you need nothing else to “be in love.”

“It makes no difference whether we go back to the teaching of Jesus and make them our own again, or whether we seek new forms. Where they strike the eternal core of humanity, the teach- ings of Jesus and Lao-tsu, of the Vedas and of Goethe are the same. There is only one doctrine. There is only one religion. There is only one Happiness. Love and joy and the mysterious thing we call “happiness” are not over here or over there, they are only within ourselves.”

- If The War Goes On -

Hermann Hesse.

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