Jonesing To Keep Up With The Joneses

Boyleing Points

As someone who battles with maturity (I never tire of colonoscopy jokes and anything related) I’m not an authority on what makes a grown-up.  But the beauty of being a columnist is you get to spout on about things you have no clue about. It’s kind of like being president. Hey, take it easy, I didn’t say which president.

Being mature doesn’t necessarily mean giving up things.  Giving up on staying out to the wee hours isn’t a sign of maturity. It just means your body is now telling you to cut it the hell out. Being mature doesn’t mean giving up basketball for golf. It just means you have bad knees or hips. Being mature doesn’t mean you have to give up Frosted Flakes. Being mature means you put the box way back in the cabinet so it takes some effort to reach.

My Be Well, Be Happy zen zone says you have reached a certain level of wisdom and maturity when you stop worrying about what other people have.  And you stop worrying about how you are perceived by them. 

Of course, such wisdom hasn’t yet crept into some 40 and 50-year-olds who still live to impress. Unfortunately, it often works. Someone drives a fancy car or lives in an extravagant house and others think highly of that person or they envy them. 

If you are impressed or crazed with envy, your road to maturity can be made smoother by considering an item from the Facts You Probably Don’t Need feature we run each week.  If you have $10 in your pocket and no debts, you are wealthier than 25 percent of Americans.

There it is. There’s a one in four shot that the person you see with all the bling is up to their eyeballs in debt. They’ve over-mortgaged the house, they get credit cards just to pay off other credit cards. Debt collectors have them on speed dial. I know they drive an expensive car, but I do not know if they sleep at night. 

So point is, there’s a good chance you’re wasting your admiration or envy on a fraud. Which brings me to Facebook, or Facebook-induced psychosis. Yes, I dabble in psychology and have a diploma from the National Enquirer and a university named after a president. Take it easy, I didn’t say which one.

Psychosis is a break from reality and so is Facebook. It’s the place where everybody’s kids are perfect. That might depress you because you know your kids are not. Everybody goes on the best vacations and you are stuck at work. That guys stayed at the Ritz and you were at a Motel 6. You spiral into depression because you think Facebook is real.

Or maybe you’re the one showing off and feel the need to. Well, stop.  Put down the drink.

Basically, the whole thing is set up to compare ourselves to others. It is high school revisited. And we left high school. 

Treat Facebook like a pitcher of margaritas. Overindulge sometimes, go ahead. But not every time. Stop jonesing about keeping up with the Joneses.Now go online and like our Facebook page. We need to know you really like us.

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